Beautiful, Balmy Buffalo (Fall 1997)
By Dick Stein
 
Buffalo is very few people's--OK, nobody's--dream vacation destination. I had to explain to friends why I was going to Buffalo, saying it was for a convention. (Since I didn't admit that it was the National Stuttering Project, does that mean I am in the closet as a stutterer?) Riding from the Buffalo airport to the Marriott, the shuttle van passengers--all NSP folks--were giving the driver a hard time with our smart-ass remarks about Buffalo, He took them very good-naturedly.
 
Fortunately, Buffalo in late June is a bit nicer than Buffalo in February, and the 1997 convention in that city had almost perfect weather. Our hotel was nice, too, with gorgeously landscaped grounds.
 
But, to backtrack: I had learned of the Passing Twice workshop sometime before the '96 NSP convention in Denver; but, much as I was looking forward to meeting the gay and lesbian participants in the Passing Twice workshop, I was not able to make it to Denver. I regretted that, and my regret was increased by being told what a great experience I had missed. So I simply had to get to Buffalo, despite having started a new job only one week earlier.
 
For me, the convention was somewhat like the times I have attended a Mensa national convention, where there was the presence of a Gay and Lesbian Special Interest Group, with whom I wanted to spend much of my time. But conventions always have their sessions, their presentations, and one might want to achieve a balance between attending as many sessions as possible, on the one hand, and socializing with sub-group members, on the other hand. This time there was no conflict. There were several opportunities to spend time with Passing Twice workshop participants, and except for the workshop itself, these were scheduled for times when the NSP schedule left us on our own.
 
The Passing Twice workshop has grown since 1992, to a record 17 attendees--so large a number that the 75 minutes that the NSP allotted was almost consumed by our introductions of ourselves! Despite what a talkative bunch we turned out to be, the workshop's facilitators, Larry Sailor and Nora O'Connor, pretty much kept us to the workshop agenda.
 
Then, on Friday evening, after workshops were over, many of us journeyed to a trendy section of Buffalo (some of us in a big white limo!), where we found a great Greek restaurant and then a gay bar. Early Saturday evening, many of us gathered in Larry Sailor's room and then a bit later we made up our own table at the banquet. And on Sunday, some participants went to Toronto for the city's Gay Pride parade--which your reporter wishes he could report on, but unfortunately was not able to attend-- or to Niagara Falls (ditto, for different reasons).
 
NSP conventions are apparently known for producing a "high" in those who attend, partly because we learn things that are useful in coping with our stuttering and our feelings about stuttering, but also just because they let us be among "our own kind." A man who presented at one of the workshops pointed out that, during NSP, people who stutter are in the majority. We could enjoy the experience of the tables turned, where you don't fit in if you don't stutter; and of course gay men and lesbians who attended the Passing Twice workshop had a still rarer experience, being able to be among "our own kind" when it means a minority-within-a-minority.
 
And it was a very good feeling. There were lots of hugs all around. Even though many of the Passing Twice workshop participants had cemented their friendships over the course of several NSPs, and I was a newcomer, I was nevertheless made to feel welcome, to feel I belonged. Passing Twice participants are a very special bunch of folks. I came away with much material, some new friends, and very warm memories.

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